LIVIN' FOR THESE DAYS...

Ahh, yes...it is the days that turn out like this that encourage me to keep my head, chin, and spirits up after coming through some of the most horrible days I thought I would feel. It's not for anything profound, nothing remarkable...It has simply been the getting up with no headache, feeling like I've rested well, hearing my 2 year old talking to herself, seeing my smiling husband's morning face, chatting with my step-daughter, going shopping and NOT feeling worn out,,,
basically I have felt fairly human today and it has been wonderful.
My spring semester at Southern finally came to a close this past Thursday and I have yet to feel the let-down from trudging through it all. My horse blinders were on and secured in place for the past 4 months just to get me through school while it seemed all hell was breaking loose in my little bubble world around me. Cancer and classes do not mix, much like oil and water. But I SOMEHOW was able to get through the semester and do pretty well (grades are not officially out until next month). I think I was just numb to everything going on just to get myself through it all......from diagnosis to surgery, and beginning my spring semester to my last final. I think I'm still in shock that it's done for the summer, and I am half way through treatment. WHAT A RELIEF!!!!!!!!!!!
I have to thank everyone for the prayers and encouragement, at the sake of sounding like a broken record...the thoughtfulness and strength of all those behind me have really carried me through, and I'm sure have played a HUGE part in how well I feel in between treatments.
You are all a tremendous blessing to me.

Moments of fear, facing the truth...

This has to be one of the most horrific trials in my life. I never knew how low I would feel, but the fear of being gone, not knowing if my surgery has really gotten rid of everything has tested my faith beyond what I ever believed. I hang on, white knuckling the moments I can, but realize I have to let go and trust that I am in good hands. I want to be where I am supposed to be in this life I have been given. I only continue to hope and pray that I am meant to be here for a much longer period...there is too much I haven't seen, haven't done, and my kids are my life...I am NOT ready to be gone. Lord, just hold me in your hands and do with my life as you see fit. These are my moments of fear, learning to face the truth...

Today has been slow and I'm feeling the aches and pains of the chemo and injection...I'm just plugging along and hoping to fight through it as much as I can this weekend. I HATE being couped up on the couch all weekend, especially when the boys have soccer and lil'bit wants me to play with her...half way there, half way there....I just have to keep repeating it.

Half-way done...

Today was my second of four chemo sessions. I know I have jumped waaayyyyy ahead of my journey here, but I wanted to get in to add this tonight. I am journaling during my sessions before catching a good nap...heck I am there for at least 4 hours at an infusion, I may as well take advantage.
Next post will go back and I will catch everyone up.....it has been quite a ride so far.

Welcome to my blog! I have been asked by a few people if I plan on, or if I already have been , blogging my journey through this breast cancer ordeal. Well, here it is. I am up and down, and won't always be in here as often as I would like, but for those of you interested in following this process, here it will be.
It was too difficult in the beginning to track every step...it was just too emotional to sit and journal or log it all, what with appointments, tests, emotions, full-time school just starting all at the same time. I didn't want to face it was really happening, and putting it all down would only make it that much more real for me. I decided to let this path be what it would be, my husband at my side, doing most of the reading up, and let God work through the hands of the doctors and nurses who were to be charged with my care. So far, what an AMAZING team of gifted individuals!
So join me, at your leisure, and see how things have gone and continue to go. I will try to keep updating regularly, but if not, hang in there.....I AM!!!!!!!